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Entertainment

YOUR BEST BETTE FOR A LAUGH

BETTE Midler’s variety show, “The Divine Miss Millennium Tour,” is an outlandish affair that draws its humor from controlled chaos, surreal stagecraft and sharp-tongued wit.

Oh, yeah – Midler also has the pipes to carry the straight stuff, too.

The concert – in two acts – turned the mighty Madison Square Garden into an intimate cabaret theater, where Midler and her 10-gal song-‘n’-dance troupe entertained with wild costuming and campy, oddball routines.

Midler’s mad vision seemed to tickle the just-from-work crowd, nudging fans out of their rat-race mind-set. One had to grin when, near the opening number, Midler stated her intent: “We’re taking the trash off the streets and putting it back on the stage where it belongs.”

Late in the show, after she had toppled the walls of good taste and delivered her anything-goes routines, grins were replaced by belly-laughs and the dabbing of tears of mirth, as Midler finishing her “Delores Delgado for President” number in mermaid fins and a motorized wheelchair.

Act One, which opened with Midler emerging from a giant globe, was the slower of the two parts. In this segment, it seemed as if the demented diva was feeling her way through the show, gauging if she had a ballad audience or if they liked it rough. Thankfully, it was the latter.

The early straight stuff was highlighted by the Mamas and Papas’ smooth-groove hit “Do You Wanna Dance,” with Midler conjuring the sultry sizzle of the tune. Her version of “The Rose” – though a big hit with her fans – was, unfortunately, a yawner.

But Midler got the concert back on its twisted path with the musical comedy of “Otto,” her ode to the inventor of the bra. As she sang, her girls illustrated the trials and errors of the developer of the “breast sling.”

That song was the broom with which Miss M swept away all sense of reality, paving the way for the next number, “Marijuana,” in which she did the reefer madness dance with a pair of giant doobies.

Act Two was split between the “Delgado” musical-comedy routine – which was funny, though peppered with blue material that you wouldn’t want to have to explain to your kids – and a finale that emphasized Midler’s voice.

Of those closing songs, she was especially good on the R&B tune “I Think It’s Gonna Rain,” the bittersweet reminiscence of “Sunrise, Sunset,” and the Frank Sinatra classic “One for My Baby.”

But if there was a single song that the audience had to hear, a song that, if excluded, would have left the house feeling cheated, it was “The Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy.” And Midler delivered this the late-concert show-stopper so well, she brought the house to a standing ovation.

You wouldn’t want to see this show again, but it was a refreshing performance in which Midler was willing to do anything for a laugh and give everything for the song.

Midler and company continue “The Divine Miss Millennium” tour with a performance at the arena at the Meadowlands Sports Complex tomorrow, the Taj Mahal in Atlantic City on Saturday and at the Nassau Coliseum Nov. 2.