PICK OF THE WEEK
Given the purple language and topics of the films that opened this week, you might want to play it safe this weekend and catch “Chicken Run,” “Thomas and the Magic Railroad” or “Pokemon 2000,” if you and the kids haven’t seen them already. By now there should be plenty of seats.
As for new releases, here’s our rundown:
RECOMMENDED WITH RESERVATIONS
“SPACE COWBOYS” (PG-13): Clint Eastwood, Tommy Lee Jones, James Garner and Donald Sutherland are geezers in space – four former U.S. Air Force test pilots who had hoped to fly to the moon in the ’50s but were sidelined with the birth of NASA.
When a Sputnik-era Russian space satellite threatens to fall to Earth, wouldn’t you know it: NASA recruits the quartet to fix the problem, provided they pass the stringent physical and mental astronaut requirements. You bet your prostate they can!
Language: Hefty profanity until the second half, when the movie settles down.
Sex: Naked senior male butt.
Violence: Drunken fisticuffs and some abstract danger in space, but no gore.
Audience: If not for all the profanity, this would have been fine for younger audiences. As it is, it’s definitely for ages 13 and up.
NOT RECOMMENDED
“HOLLOW MAN” (R): Kevin Bacon plays a latter-day mad scientist experimenting with invisibility. Apparently, the tough part isn’t disappearing – it’s returning to flesh and blood.
When the serum succeeds on test animals, the good doctor and his team (Elisabeth Shue and Josh Brolin) decide to test it on a human. While Bacon goes see-through, his personality remains solidly rude. It’s the beginning of the end for the experiment, but not before more than lab rats sacrifice their lives for the cause.
Language: Plenty of profanity.
Sex: It may be about invisibility, but we saw full frontal male nudity.
Violence: From the very beginning, when an invisible foe inhales a rodent, it’s a grisly bit of business.
Audience: Mature teens only.
“COYOTE UGLY” (PG-13): A fairy tale about a pretty blonde (Piper Perabo) who dreams of becoming a songwriter just like her late mother.
She skips college, moves to New York, loses all her earthly possessions and takes a job at a bar where the bartenders dance lewdly on the bar without getting the money lap dancers do for nearly the same services.
There’s a nice little message here about being true to one’s dreams, and teen LeAnn Rimes sings a batch of songs – but there’s a reason children aren’t allowed in bars, and it’s not just about the booze.
Language: A handful of dirty words.
Sex: Cinderella sleeps with her prince on their second date. While they’re carefully draped in silk sheeting, there’s a whole lot of shaking going on.
Violence: Serial bar brawls.
Audience: Adults, who might be inspired to add to their kids’ college funds.