SPECTOR OF DOOM
Legendary and eccentric album producer Phil Spector, 62, was arrested and charged with first-degree murder after B-movie actress Lana Clarkson, 40, was found shot dead in the foyer of Spector’s California manse. The recluse was released on bail as police searched his home. Cops say they’re having trouble finding clues because Spector has laid down too many tracks.
SWEDE MEMORIES
Swedish researchers say that cell phones could harm certain parts of the brain and lead to the early onset of Alzheimer’s disease. After being disconnected in mid-sentence, calling each other back simultaneously, hitting each other’s voice-mail, and finally resuming their discussion, they couldn’t remember what they were talking about.
BELL BUSTER
A jury found Leona Helmsley discriminated against Charles Bell, the former manager of the Park Lane Hotel, for being gay and told her to pay up $11.175 million in damages. After the trial, Helmsley asked: “What am I going to lose now? My virginity?” After everyone’s seen her lose her shirt, it’s unlikely.
POTTER HEADS
The next Harry Potter book, “Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire,” will be the highest-priced children’s book ever, coming in at the suggested retail price of $29.99. A spokeswoman for Scholastic Children’s Books said that the price was needed to cover the production cost of churning out each several hundred-page tome. Kids don’t buy the rationalization, but say at least the book costs less than a pack of cigarettes in Manhattan.This week is the kid-friendly installment of Dinner Party Cheat Sheet. One special winner will receive an all expense-paid trip to the Jackson mansion. One catch: you have to share a bed.
OFF THE WALL
Michael Jackson continued his humiliating series of attempts to redeem his public image this week, with a thoroughly creepy interview on ABC TV, in which he described sleeping in the same bed as his kiddie friends. When asked when he knew when it was time to put the kids to bed, Jackson simply responded “When the big hand is on the little hand.”