WHAT a remarkable week. Another satire-proof, you-can’t-make-this- stuff-up week.
For starters, the residue from the “Not In My House” Florida International-Univ. of Miami riot was, in some ways, as disturbing as the riot.
Consider that the Miami Dade Police Department, in conjunction with its “Join-a-Team, Not-a-Gang” program, took 700 kids to a football game – the FIU-Miami game. See? You can’t make this stuff up.
Of course, with Miami’s 25-year track record and American gang culture now ingrained in football – the sport and its marketing and TV strategists for years have pandered to and even promoted it – the cops should have known better. What is the official pepper spray of the NCAA?
Then there was Game 7 of the NLCS on Thursday. Albert Pujols, superstar, hit a high infield fly. Carlos Delgado dropped it. On tape, Pujols was seen in a walking jog toward first until the ball was dropped. He turned it on and reached second.
On Fox, Joe Buck noted that Pujols at first didn’t hustle, but added that Pujols wouldn’t have finished past second if he had.
How did Buck know that? Anything can happen with a ball in play and a man running the bases. But Buck missed the greatest point: It was Game 7!
Not even the game to determine the NL pennant could inspire a player to the least he could do, to a common sense, greater-good fundamental. Not even Game 7 of the NLCS could inspire Pujols to a light run to first base. Remarkable.
ESPN’s weekly in-booth, in-game, attention-killing guest on Monday Night Football was Charles Barkley. The fact the 1-4 Cards were beating the 5-0 Bears, at the time, didn’t matter. ESPN sticks to its plans, most of which are designed to make jerks of its audiences.
As overly exposed as Barkley is – two nights later he appeared on The Golf Channel – on this night, in the wake of Fox’s firing of Steve Lyons for a perceived slur against Hispanics, Barkley might have proven a topical guest.
After all, throughout his public career, Barkley has made insensitive racial cracks and slurs, mostly about white people. Remarkably, he claimed “blatant racism” against Tiger Woods was the reason Augusta National was being lengthened. Woods, however, was among the greatest beneficiaries of a longer Masters course.
And while Barkley has never been held accountable for his racial slurs, his TV career has continued to flourish. We were hoping Barkley, in view of the Lyons firing, would be asked how he’d explain such a remarkable incongruity.
Heck, there were too many white athletes competing for HBO’s Bryant Gumbel to take the Winter Olympics seriously, yet – remarkably – he was appointed the lead voice of the new NFL Network.
During Lions-Jets today on Fox, when third-down conversion stats are posted, here’s hoping someone notes the remarkable beating the Dolphins laid on the Jets last Sunday. Yep, Miami destroyed them on third down conversions, eight-of-15 to four-of-13.
Two weeks ago, ESPN 1050’s Stephen A. Smith said he never celebrates his birthday because it’s the anniversary of his brother’s death. We’re not sure why he’d choose to bring up such a sad, personal thing, but OK, he did.
This past week, Smith spoke of how he’s hung over, having spent the weekend drinking, clubbing and partying – in celebration of his birthday.
Remarkable.
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Brian Kenny, among our favorite ESPN studio guys – who for some odd reason has been allowed to maintain his dignity – will become a regular 6 p.m. “SportsCenter” anchor, starting tomorrow . . . At ESPN 1050 it’s Colin Cowherd out, weekdays 10 a.m. to noon, Max Kellerman in, starting tomorrow.
Inside job? Fox’s Game 7 Shea crowd shots included one of Mike Breen and another of his former boss at MSG Network, Mike McCarthy . . . For all the good reaction shots Fox has provided throughout the postseason, we’d trade ’em all for a shot of Scott Rolen‘s face during and right after Endy Chavez‘s catch.
Everyone loves (or was supposed to love) the wild card, added playoff teams, added excitement! Yay! Except that the Twins, who couldn’t lose to the A’s, were swept by the A’s. The Tigers, who couldn’t beat the Yanks, beat the Yanks. And the 83-win Cards, who couldn’t beat the Mets, are in the World Series. Yay!
As reader Eric Taub of New York City notes, the Rangers’ Team Store is selling Rangers’ T-shirts saluting Ranger Brendan Shanahan for his 600th goal – two of which were scored as a Ranger.