In 1995, 56-year-old Sonny Graham was dying of congestive heart failure and needed a heart.
Terry Cottle, a 33-year-old laborer from Summerville, SC, had just shot himself in the head.
Graham received Cottle’s heart, recovered and eventually sought out Cottle’s wife, Cheryl, to thank her for the gift of life.
From the moment Sonny Graham first laid eyes on Cheryl, he felt like he had known her for years.
“She gave me this big smile, and I couldn’t keep my eyes off her,” he told the Island Packet newspaper in December 2006.
Graham left his wife of 35 years and married Cheryl.
Then, last week, he shot himself in the head almost exactly as Terry Cottle had.
After receiving his donor’s heart, friends and family say, Graham in some ways became him.
He married the same woman, started drinking the same beer – though he’d never been a beer drinker – and ended his life the same way.
Scientists say they have documented more than 70 cases of transplant recipients taking on the personalities of their donors. The Journal of Near Death Studies published a research paper by University of Arizona medical professor Gary Schwartz in 2002 about the cases.
Schwartz attributed the trend to the fact that living cells have memory systems that store information and can be passed along to organ recipients. It’s an idea that has not yet been embraced by mainstream medical science.
“One prediction is that sensitive recipients of transplanted organs can experience aspects of the donor’s personal history stored in the transplanted tissue,” he said.
Graham’s behavior changed almost immediately after his transplant. “I never saw him drink a beer in his life,” said best friend Bill Carson. “It was a year or two after the transplant. He started screaming, ‘Stop the car; I’ve got to get a beer.’ Steve [another pal] said, ‘You don’t drink beer.’ And Sonny said, ‘I know, I’m just craving a beer and I need one now.’ ”
Graham later learned from Cheryl that the brand he drank was the same as his heart donor, Carson said.
Heart recipient Paul Oldam, 67, of Milwaukee, said that while he’s not sold on the scientific reasoning, he has no explanation for his cravings for sweets since acquiring the heart of a 14-year-old boy in 1993.
“I never had a sweet tooth. And I remember that after I got out of the hospital, my wife and I were at the mall and I walked straight into a candy store and started buying candy,” he said. His wife was startled.
Claire Sylvia, 68, who received the heart and lungs of an 18-year-old man, began to crave fried chicken, green peppers and beer.
The donor’s family told her that those were favorites of her donor, Tim Lamirande of Maine.
“Even my walk became more manly,” said Sylvia, of Lighthouse Point, Fla., who had her transplant 20 years ago. “I was more aggressive and assertive than I used to be, and more confident as well.”
Sylvia wrote a book about her experience called “A Change of Heart.”
In another case, researcher Schwartz describes a 25-year-old male graduate student suffering from cystic fibrosis who received the lungs of a 24-year-old lesbian.
“I thought having a woman’s heart would make me gay,” he said. “Since my surgery, I’ve been hornier than ever and women just seem to look even more erotic and sensual.
“I make love like I know exactly how the woman’s body feels and responds – almost as if it’s my body.”
The man’s girlfriend said that besides the increased libido, he also enjoys shopping like never before and he’s much more affectionate.
In another case, a 34-year-old coop was shot attempting to arrest a drug dealer. His heart went to a 56-year-old college professor who later started having strange dreams that involved a flash of light in his face and a glimpse of Jesus. The recipient later learned the donor was shot in the face. The dealer, who has never been found, was described as having a Jesus-like appearance.
“I would see a flash, and then my face would get real, real hot,” he said.
Some recipients have discovered a new appreciation for poetry and music after receiving organs from donors who similarly inclined. Others say they were re-energized and youthful after receiving a heart from a young donor.