TAMPA – No one thinks about himself more and knows himself less than Alex Rodriguez.
This is just another unfortunate result when a runaway ego merges with limitless insecurity. That problematic blend causes A-Rod to say the wrong thing so often at the wrong time, a Yankee official explained, because he is always trying to figure out what people want to hear rather than what is truly on his mind.
FULL HOUSE EXPECTED FOR ‘ROID ROAST
It makes you wonder if Rodriguez even has a heart at a moment when perhaps only speaking truly from that organ can save him. Rodriguez is set to hold a news conference today at 1:30 p.m. for the first time since a Sports Illustrated report revealed last weekend he had tested positive for steroids in 2003 and Rodriguez confirmed two days later that he used banned substances in his Rangers years, 2001-2003.
In that ESPN interview, Rodriguez again gave off the impression that he was trying to please too many masters, namely his handlers and lawyers, who wanted him to be as vague as possible, plus a public that A-Rod probably thought needed to hear admission and contrition. The result was a 30-plus minute interview so full of dubious statements that it left more questions than answers, and left A-Rod – if anything – a less sympathetic figure.
He gets another shot at today’s news conference, his most important at-bat to date. More than a dozen teammates, coaches and executives plan to attend. It is a nice gesture of support that nevertheless probably says more about peer pressure and the need to comfort Rodriguez to make winning easier than pure feelings of friendship or compassion for A-Rod.
But if Rodriguez truly has a heart, he could begin to win over the doubters in uniform and a generally forgiving nation. In explaining his Emancipation Proclamation, Abraham Lincoln once humbly said, “I claim not to have controlled events, but confess plainly that events have controlled me.” Of course, Lincoln had genius and humanity to meet monumental moments.
Now, in a week commemorating Lincoln’s 200th birthday, Rodriguez is controlled by events, because he certainly was not going to out himself as a steroid cheat. But – like Lincoln – he will be judged by how he handles what is thrust upon him. Can he be Honest A-Rod, and speak not from prepared notes or like a dummy manipulated by an off-camera ventriloquist, but from that heart we wonder if he has?
Can he find the truth inside himself to say he soiled or destroyed everything that has ever mattered to him professionally? Being viewed as the greatest player ever. Becoming the all-time home run champ. Going into the Hall of Fame with the largest vote percentage ever.
Can he say out loud how dumb it was to take the drugs because he was going to achieve so much of this naturally? Can he talk with sincerity about the horrors of becoming a distraction to these teammates around him when distractions can derail a championship season?
Can he make a genuine symbolic gesture such as turning that $30 million of me-first homer milestone money into a donation to a drug-prevention charity? But can he do more by really revealing himself as a sym bol of sa botaging your own dreams? Can he show other players and kids how dumb it is to fall prey to ego, greed and following misguided cheaters? Can he let himself become the cautionary tale by fully revealing his guilt, shame and stupidity? Can he say, “Look at me, look at what I did to myself, look at what illegal shortcuts do. Look at what I should have been and look at what I have allowed myself to become,” and mean it?
Can he do all of this without bogus statements like not knowing he had tested positive in 2003 until two weeks ago? Can he avoid coming across as pre-programmed, insincere, and smug? In essence, can he prove he has a heart from which to speak; that a real human being lurks inside his skin?
Because the only person who can save Rodriguez now has his name. He doesn’t need to be Lincoln, but the road from contrition to salvation begins with showing that Alex Rodriguez really exists.