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Entertainment

Tonys won’t win an award for exposure

This year’s Tony Awards show didn’t make much day-after noise or news.

Why?

By my estimation (pure guesswork) last Sunday’s edition on CBS featured at least 75 percent less cleavage than any recent Academy Awards or Golden Globes show. In other words, necklines were up, photo ops were down. The promise that a breast might stage a jail break was never at issue.

In fact, the most daring dresses worn by any of this year’s Tony Awards presenters, nominees and performers were worn by the men from “La Cage Au Folles.”

Sunday, it seemed that folks to some extent were forced to watch the Tonys to see “what they’re wearing,” as opposed to the Academy Awards or Globes, which are in some part watched to see what they’re not wearing. This year’s Tonys offered modern America little to pay attention to. What were we supposed to do? Focus on that wonderful, gratitude-enriched and inspiring speech given by special-honor recipient Angela Lansbury? Nah.

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Viacom-owned Spike TV’s relentlessness in targeting males, 10-25, for desensitization remains a very under-reported or unknown story. Spike recently added what was once sorrowfully known as “midget wrestling.” Such “freak show” forms of entertainment were supposed to have vanished in the 1970s.

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If, after a 15-year sleep, you woke up on a Saturday morning and turned on a TV set, you’d figure that TV is going out of business, that you awoke in the midst of a liquidation sale and that the real TV must be seen on something else.

Weekday programming hours are now scandalously stuffed with paid programming/infomercials.

Ch. 2, from 1-2 p.m., Saturdays, is for sale. On Saturdays, Ch. 5 presents infomercials from 10a.m. to 3 p.m. Ch. 4, Sundays from 2-3 p.m. is sold to folks selling anything from dubious investment advice to life-changing blenders that are so remarkable that they’ll throw in an extra one at no additional cost.

Yesterday, Ch. 5 was scheduled to present 9 1/2 hours of infomercials, 5 1/2 of them in daylight hours.

Kingston NY-based WRNN, a cable “must-carry” over-the-air channel, runs “Act now! Operators are standing by!” infomercials nearly 20 hours a day — every day. It’s another home shopping channel.

Despite the loss of more and more daylight and prime-time programming to infomercials, TV subscription fees continue to rise. And it’s unlikely to stop until all of us own one or more of those blenders.

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Question: Why have the media determined that Kanye West’s and Spike Lee’s opinions of the U.S. Presidency are more important than, say, anyone else’s?

One more: When CNN/Headline News’ ghoulish crime-tracker, Nancy Grace, first learns that a young woman or a child has been — select as many as you wish — kidnapped, raped, murdered — does it genuinely upset her or does she rub her hands together?

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News radio WCBS 880, last week reported the story of a team of “Backyard Burglars” operating in Westchester: Two or three of the crooks summon the homeowners to the front door to offer cheap labor to clean their backyards. As the homeowner and the crooks walk around to the backyard to survey the work to be done and negotiate a fee, other members of the crime team enter through the front door and steal what they can.

This report concluded with what the reporter said was what local cops suggested to her as a preventative solution to such a crime: “Lock the front door before going to the backyard with strangers.” Somehow — and dip me in cinnamon and call me cynical — I don’t think that’s what the cops suggested.

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Ch. 11 News’ “WTF” promos — in this case WTF stands for “what’s the forecast” — are so clever, hip and desperate that they make us LOL — lose our lunch.