Laundry day is extra crappy for students at an Illinois college — where a fecal fiend has turned the school’s washing machines into his own personal toilet.
At least eight college kids have found their clothing covered in poop in a laundry room at the Abbott Hall dorm at Southern Illinois University, according to the campus newspaper, the Daily Egyptian.
“Now I’m, like, terrified,” said Khiyah Ransom, a sophomore who lives in the building. “I was really upset about it, just wondering who’s doing this pooping.”
The serial deuce dropper often targets wet laundry inside machines when students leave their clothing unattended, according to the paper.
The students had no idea why anyone would want to turn their jeans into dung-arees.
““It kind of surprised me,” said freshman Brian Piller, whose clothes were victimized by the deranged dumper. “I wondered if maybe someone had had an accident.”
Only one official report was filed with the school about the feces — and there hasn’t been a number two, a school spokeswoman told The Post.
“Housing staff received one report of an incident in September,” said Rae Goldsmith, the university’s chief communications officer.
“Following the report, staff members initiated conversations with students about responsible group living and respect for each other’s property,” she said.
She declined to say whether the poopetrator was still at large.
SIU’s culprit harkens the filthy behavior of the world’s most famous — and still at large– defecator, Colorado’s Mad Pooper, a jogger who simply won’t stop pooping on people’s lawns.