Butt-Con: The wildest scenes at NYC’s ‘Holey Experience’
Butt-Con was the tuchus trade show no one asked for — and it let nothing rump-related fall through the cracks.
Leave it to Miki Agrawal, the since-ousted CEO of the period undie start-up Thinx — who bartered away lattes made with her own breast milk at Burning Man two years ago — to put together an event that’s partly informative, mostly a millennial-baiting marketing shtick — and just a little bit gross.
The $12-a-ticket event at Midtown Loft was sponsored by the 40-year-old entrepreneur’s latest project, “Tushy,” an attachable bidet (starting at $69), which she calls “a precise shower for your butt.”
According to attendee Ian Paterson, 31, who tried the gadget at Butt-Con, “You instantly feel the jet of water — and it’s unforgiving.”
Ditto the whole event, branded as “A Holey Experience for the Like-Behinded,” which included a belfie station made in the image of Sir Mix-A-Lot’s “Baby Got Back” music video set.
Here are some of the most ridiculous things that took place at the inaugural Butt-Con:
Twerking 101
The Dragon Sisters, the Amazonian drag queen duo, taught a gyrating, pulsating, twerk class. Says Odessah Mann, real name Cain Coleman, “The key to twerking is understanding your pelvis and hips. Spend a lot of time in front of the mirror, practicing.”
Booty facials
“Butts are the new faces,” says Dr. Rita Linkner, a dermatologist that specializes in glute skin. “People are Facetuning their backside,” she says.
For a smooth rump in real life, she recommends exfoliating with products that contain salicylic acid, glycolic acid or benzoyl peroxide for a brightening effect.
Cheeky workouts
Kardashian booty architect Jorge Cruise, 48, led an eight-minute workout to tighten and tone glutes — including lots of squats and kickbacks. Also “key” according to Cruise? An intermittent fasting diet.
Later, Mark Fisher and Corrine Wainer, who own gyms in Manhattan and Brooklyn respectively, waxed poetic about rumps.
“Create a purpose behind the a– you want,” says Wainer, who also recommends “lowering to a squat position, going on your tippy toes and pulsing for 10 counts” for a perkier derriere.
Flush with products
Colonics, bidets and a vibrating chair that promises the equivalent of 20,000 kegels in a 28-minute session could be found in the promotional corner of Butt-Con.
When it comes to flushing out the system, colonicist to the stars, Tracy Piper, who’s worked with none other than the wellness queen herself Gwyneth Paltrow, says that fiber is helpful — to a degree. “People who take too much fiber and don’t drink enough water can actually get constipated and get zits on their face,” says Piper. “Make sure you drink mineralized water. Put Himalayan sea salt on your tongue, it opens up the taste buds, and then drink water to better absorb the nutrients.”