A New York fan tries to start a rivalry with Minnesota — they’re too nice to agree
MINNEAPOLIS — This weekend, New York teams are facing a double hit of the most fearsome, unhinged fanbase known to man. We’re talking about Minnesotans — the same folks who brought us Betty Crocker, the Nordic Track, MyPillow and Zubaz.
Friday, the Yankees take on the Minnesota Twins in the first game of the ALDS. Then on Sunday, the Giants and the Vikings play at MetLife. Are you ready to rumble? Politely?
I, a lifelong Yanks and Giants fan, flew to Minnesota to let them know we’re about to eat their lunch. Turns out, they’re more than happy to share their lunch. And they’ll offer you plenty of suggestions on what to eat. “Make sure you try the walleye while you’re here, ooookay.”
When I arrived, I threw on a pinstripe jersey and Giants gear and headed to Target Field, where I started a one-woman “Let’s go Yankees!” chant as a group of runners jogged by. One dude piped up and said, “no no no no” with an emphasis on the “oooooo.” Not one person in the group gave me a “F— you.”
If this was Boston, where it’s customary to yell “Yankees suck” at most events, including funerals, I would have returned with missing teeth. But in Minnesota, they offer a hearty “well, bless you.”
Inside the Twins team store, a kind older gentleman asked me if I needed help. When he saw my jersey he said, “You’re not the enemy are ya?” When I confirmed that I was indeed the enemy he employed the same take-no-prisoners tactics of an ISIS operative. “That’s OK,” he said. “Everyone is welcome here. It’s the Minnesota Nice.”
So what’s Minnesota Nice? It’s Rose Nylund on a church bender, I learned.
Even their players who hail from elsewhere are courteous. I ran into struggling young Twins pitcher Fernando Romero outside of the stadium. I introduced myself to him and told him I was there to bring good juju to the Yankees. He smiled, shook my hand.
No one near the stadium or in the bars downtown seemed bothered that I was painting their town Big Apple red, so I went to a rougher part of the state. The Mall of America. There I met local Jerry Westgor, who was wearing a Twins T-shirt and the Vikings jacket you get when you subscribe to Sports Illustrated.
Naturally when he saw me in NY gear, he had a few things to get off his chest. First, he touted the Twins’ historic home run-hitting season provided by their “Bomba squad.” Then he showed off some of that Minnesota swagger.
“It’s not so much hatred, toward the Yankees,” Westgor said. “Because at some point I think you gotta beat them to create some kind of mean. Especially here in Minneapolis. We always come in second or don’t come in at all, like the Vikings.”
Surely the Vikings fans are more cutthroat. After all, their team is named after a group of marauding lunatics who wear horns on their heads. Former season ticket holder Jim Miller, 59, who works at a sports shop in the mall, said the fan base still remembers when the Giants humiliated them 41-0 in the NFC Championship in 2001. Obviously you’ve all been out for blood ever since, right, Jim?
“Not really, no,” he said adding, “We were however hoping that Manning would start because he always has a bad game against us. The Minnesota mentality, when it comes to sports is very pessimistic. We’ve been to the Super Bowl four times and lost four times. We haven’t been since 1976. The last time we won a major championship was the 1991 Twins. That’s a long time.”
Then the ever hospitable Miller told me I should come back for the State Fair in August.
But that’s not to mistake their kindness for a lack of dedication.
On Thursday, I met Scott Olson, 43, who was waiting on a long line outside Target Field for a playoff Homer Hanky. His wife? Well she was under the knife. “She asked me to come get a home run hankie instead of waiting at the hospital. Hopefully I can get there as she’s gets into recovery,” said Olson, who said he hoped to exorcise those “pinstripe demons.” Then he gave this girl in pinstripes a high-five.
“Hey, we’re not Boston,” he said.