Woman comes out as gay 6 years into marriage but stays with husband: ‘He’s my soulmate’
A North Carolina woman has revealed she is still married to her husband despite coming out as a lesbian two years ago.
Nicolette, 26, wed her childhood sweetheart, Ryan, 27, in 2014, with the couple going on to have two children together.
Nicolette claimed she always knew she was a lesbian but kept her sexuality a secret from her hubby until the summer of 2020.
After hearing the news, Ryan suggested Nicolette stay with him for the sake of their two young kids — and she agreed to the unconventional arrangement.
“We’re still married and we still live together in our house with our kids,” Nicolette told South West News Service in a recent interview. “For right now, what we do works. We’re trying to figure out our careers and trying to make sure that our kids have the best outcome.”
“It’s about making sure the kids are happy, making sure they know they’re loved and for them to have both parents around as much as possible.”
Nicolette still describes Ryan as her “soulmate,” despite the fact she is sexually attracted to women.
“Me and Ryan have maintained this friendship; he’ll always be my best friend,” she cooed.
“We got married when I was 19 and he was 20. We’ve been together basically through all of our 20s, and he’s that person I’ve been around constantly.”
She added: “I feel like he’ll always be my soulmate, just from a different perspective. We know how to get under each other’s skin but we also know how to be each other’s biggest supporters.”
Nicolette — who works as a delivery driver — has now found fame on TikTok documenting her unusual marriage.
Nicolette told SWNS that she is “prioritizing family life over the dating side of things,” and the brunette posts popular videos with their two kids.
While many on TikTok have expressed support for the pair, some have accused Nicolette of “wasting” Ryan’s time.
However, the supportive husband said he is happy with the current situation and wasn’t surprised that his wife was a lesbian.
“It wasn’t a shock when Nicolette came out. I started to have suspicions but I wasn’t going to ask — I was going to wait for her to tell me herself,” Ryan told SWNS.
“My family were really supportive, and they still are,” he added. “We still go on family holidays with them, we all get along really well.”
Nicolette’s family is also supportive of the pair staying married for the sake of their two sons — Jace, 5, and Clay, 4.
“I think I knew I was gay growing up, [but] here in America it can be very conservative,” Nicolette told SWNS. “My family are definitely conservative, we’re from the midwest … We grew up hunting and fishing and all that stuff, Ryan’s family are pretty religious too.”
She added: “It wasn’t really a thing to be gay when I was growing up. But as I got older, it just felt like I had this weight on my chest. I knew that there was something that I needed to figure out.”
After coming out to Ryan, Nicolette revealed her sexuality secret to her family and friends, declaring: “I’m now completely out and just kind of embraced it!”
The mom of two has found a supportive community on TikTok and has even heard from other lesbians who are still married to men.
“I’m going through something similar and my husband is in full support of me,” one woman wrote beneath a recent video posted by Nicolette. “It’s amazing to have a supportive partner.”
Another user similarly chimed in: “I went through this three years ago. He has faithfully stuck by my side through everything. I’m thankful for a best friend like him.”
However, others aren’t as sympathetic towards the unorthodox couple.
“I wish [they’d] have a divorce so the guy can have love,” one raged before another added: “I would never forgive someone who wasted my time like that.”
