Which Tony-nominated Broadway show to see based on your zodiac sign

Make your way to the Great White Way.

After a long shutdown due to the Covid-19 pandemic, Broadway officially returned at 100 percent September 2021 for a glorious season. On June 12, the 75th annual Tony Awards will air, celebrating the best that Broadway has to offer.

As The Post columnist Cindy Adams recalls of the original ceremony, there were “No statuettes. Winner Ingrid Bergman got a compact. Director Elia Kazan a cigarette lighter.” While the takeaways may have been upgraded, the race for the once absent statuettes has only grown fiercer.

This year’s list of nominated shows at the 2022 Tonys, which were named afterr American actress and Cancer sun Mary Antoinette “Tony” Perry, is a star studded affair with the likes of Hugh Jackman, Mary Louise Parker, Laurence Fishburne, Sam Rockwell, Billy Crystal, Sarah Jessica Parker, Matthew Broderick, Beanie Feldstein all hoping to grace the stage and take home a tiny gold trophy.

Tickets to Broadway shows, do not come cheap. To help theatre lovers choose between contenders and where to deposit their nickels and affections, we are turning to another kind of star power, astrology. Read on to learn more about which show best aligns with your zodiac sign.

ARIES (March 21 – April 19)

Mr. Saturday Night

The only thing an Aries hates more than people who drive below the speed limit is the thought of their own irrelevance. Enter Billy Crystal as Buddy Young in “Mr. Saturday Night.” The show is an adaptation of Crystal’s 1992 film of the same name and follows Buddy’s comeback attempt after an Emmy tribute erroneously reports him as dead. In true impatient, outraged fire sign form, Buddy launches his renaissance act the very next day. Aries are no strangers to conflict, you can often identify by them by the blisters on their thumbs, a side effect of burning all their bridges. Buddy’s life bears the mark of similar scorching as he works to repair his relationships with his brother and daughter. Aries is the class clown of the zodiac so it tracks that the best Broadway bet for this cardinal sign would be one with relentless laughs and a redemptive arch.

TAURUS (April 20 – May 20)

Plaza Suite

“Plaza Suite,” a three act plays set in Suite 719 of the Plaza Hotel stars real life spouses and stage veterans Matthew Broderick and Sarah Jessica Parker. The duo play three different couples all of whom exhibit the Taurean preference for plush surroundings as an anecdote to personal strife. Taurus rules the second house of values and possessions so it tracks that Broderick’s characters in the first and third acts are preoccupied with money and how and for whom it is being spent. Taurus volleys between serious loyalty and deep carnality, qualities alive in well in the ladies Parker portrays including a relentlessly romantic wife and a would be adulteress.

GEMINI (May 21 – June 20)

A Strange Loop

Usher, the narrator/stand in for playwright Michael R. Jackson in “A Strange Loop” is Gemini incarnate. Usher is a movie theatre employee who moonlights as a writer and Gemini is ruled by Mercury, planet of communication, exchange and of course, the written word. Highly verbal, Gemini energy finds familiarity in Usher whose dialogue is mostly comprised of him speaking and singing to a chorus of his own thoughts, a call and response that will make Gemini’s feel very much at home.

American Buffalo

The duality of Gemini nature is also on display in “American Buffalo” where the good cop/bad cop, better twin/lesser twin, pawn shop owner/violnet hustler dynamic is brought to glorious life by Laurence Fishburne and Sam Rockwell. The revival of the 1975 play, up for four Tony Awards, also stars Darren Criss.

CANCER (June 21 – July 22)

Girl From the North Country

“Girl From the North Country,” employs the songs of Bob Dylan to tell a sorrowful story about sad people. This description will be catnip to water signs and repellant to fire signs. As the play’s narrator professes, “Pain comes in all kinds: physical, spiritual, indescribable,” and lord knows Cancers are versed in all varietals of suffering. Cancer is ruled by the moon and associated with the archetype of the mother, true to form, one of the main characters doubles down on the association by being a pregnant unwed orphan. Cancers are feelers that must sometimes mitigate their absorption of psychic debris with meditation, ritual cleansing, digital detoxes and talk therapy. Because none of these avenues are available to the protagonists of the play, set in 1934, the character of Gene falls on the shortcut Cancer cure of heavy drinking and heartbroken longing. Cancer is the most nostalgic sign in the zodiac and thus it is utterly fitting that “Girl From the North Country” echoes both a time and a songbook of yore.

LEO (July 23 – August 22)

SIX

Leo rules the heart and is the sign of regents and romantics. Enter SIX, a story about six women married, marred or otherwise altered by King Henry VIII of England. The ladies tell their tales, competing for the title of worst suffering wife and the role of lead singer of their sextet. Competition is oxygenating for Leos and performing their anguish is all in a day’s work, making SIX a perfect ten for the lion kingdom.

VIRGO (August 23 – September 22)

Take Me Out

Virgo energy is about purification and the pursuit of perfection. Enter, “Take Me Out.” What better compliment to the sign of clean living and clarity than this much lauded story of athletic excellence, personal truth and a shower scene that has become the stuff of viral legend? The show is anchored by Jesse William’s whose portrayal of recently out MLB player, Darren Lemming garnered him a Tony nomination for Best Performance by a Featured Actor in a Play. Batter up, d**ks out and best of luck, Jesse.

LIBRA (September 23 – October 22)

for colored girls who have considered suicide/ when the rainbow is enuf

Libra is ruled by Venus, planet of love, beauty, aesthetics and song. Libra writer Ntozake Shange’s genre defying “for colored girls who have considered suicide/when the rainbow is not enough,” billed as a “choreopoem” the play calls on all of Venus’s children to express both joy and suffering. Libra is synonymous with social justice and rules the seventh house of partnership and in this play, it is the combined energy and shared spirit of the rainbow cast that allows Shange’s message to resonate.

SCORPIO (October 23 – November 21)

Funny Girl

Based on the life, times and love affairs of unconventional beauty, burlesque star, comedienne and real life Scorpio Fanny Brice, the recent revival of “Funny Girl” is an apropos pick for this water sign. Scorpio has no fear of the dark and a different, divergent relationship with beauty. These people care not for polish, only substance. It tracks that the intrinsic power and force to be reckoned with vibe of a Scorpio woman like Fanny would intimidate a con artist like her husband Nick and that a shadow loving Scorpio would excuse nefarious business practices as the sign rules the eighth house of sex, death and other people’s money. Perhaps most telling of all is that in the end, Fanny is not destroyed by love but rather rises from the ashes of it, a Scorpio tale of resilience if ever there was one.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22 – December 21)

How I Learned To Drive

Penned by real life Sagittarius playwright Paula Vogel, “How I Learned to Drive” features Mary Louise Parker as Lil Bit, a role she first played in the 1990’s and one that earned her a Tony nomination this year. The zodiac sign of Sagittarius is connected to the centaur, a hybrid creature from Greek mythology. In kind, How I Learned to Drive is brought to life by the presence of a Greek chorus. While darker themes of alcohol abuse and pedophilia are present in the play, the overarching message is freedom sought and freedom found through wheels, both literal and metaphorical, being put into motion.

CAPRICORN (December 22 – January 19)

MJ: The Musical

Capricorn is the uncontested ‘dad’ of the zodiac with a stern approach and a big picture mentality. Ruled by strict planet Saturn, Capricorn energy rests on strategy and stead ascent. One could argue that Michael Jackson, and by extension the musical MJ, is the byproduct, good and bad of his own harsh father, Joe Jackson whose punishing practices both made and unmade the man in the mirror. Further, Capricorn rules the tenth house of public image, and there is perhaps no more famous name in the cultural lexicon nor tune in the collective mind than Michael’s.

AQUARIUS (January 20 – February 18)

Paradise Square

Aquarius has two planetary rulers; structured Saturn and revolutionary Uranus, together the two are capable of supporting or reimagining life as we know it. If Saturn is the past and Uranus is the future, “Paradise Square” is something in the middle. As one narrator describes the plot as, “A group of Americans lived in the future — a future that has not yet been realized.” We see the aspirational promise of NYC in Paradise Square’s 19th Century version of the city, where free people of color and Irish immigrants live in relative harmony. Aquarius rules the eleventh house of friends and community making this musical a natural fit for this fixed air sign. Paradise Square is nominated for ten Tony Awards including Best Musical.

Company

If we subscribe, as I do, that cities are designated a zodiac sign on the day on which they are founded, New York City is, itself, an Aquarius, a blend of tradition and innovation, established structures and new foundations. All are at play (pun intended) in the universally celebrated revival of “Company.” First penned and performed in the 1970’s the late, great Steven Sondheim’s “Company” has been brought back to Broadway with a few powerful updates. Not least and certainly most progressive among these amendments is that the play’s protagonist, Bobbue, battling between the structure of committed relationships and the wild unknown of life alone (a very Aquarian dilemma), has been recast as a woman. The play has been nominated for nine Tony Awards.

PISCES (February 19 – March 20)

Pisces, often to their own detriment, see the best in people. These water signs can really shine a turd as they believe like the fairy tale creatures they are, that love can truly transform a degenerate. Bless them, they find their sentiments reflected and faith restored in “The Music Man.” In this revival of this classic musical, Hugh Jackman plays hustler Harold Hill who comes to town to swindle the citizens and ends up having his own heart stolen by local librarian and uncontested Pisces Marian Paroo, played by Sutton Foster. It’s the kind of feel good, shamelessly whimsical, redemption through romance, saved by sound vibe that fish folks can’t refuse.

Astrology 101: Your guide to the stars

Astrologer Reda Wigle researches and irreverently reports back on planetary configurations and their effect on each zodiac sign. Her horoscopes integrate history, poetry, pop culture and personal experience. She is also an accomplished writer who has profiled a variety of artists and performers, as well as extensively chronicled her experiences while traveling. Among the many intriguing topics she has tackled are cemetery etiquette, her love for dive bars, Cuban Airbnbs, a “girls guide” to strip clubs and the “weirdest” foods available abroad.