Beloved childhood favorites are being killed in sick horror film trend
Have yourself a scary little Christmas.
A new parody film, “The Mean One,” is slashing through the snow with a twisted take on the holiday classic “How the Grinch Stole Christmas.” It reimagines that the big, green, disgruntled furball (played by David Howard Thornton, “Terrifier”) didn’t actually save Whoville — here rechristened as Newville — from a Dec. 25 without presents.
Instead, he was stalkin’ around the Christmas tree and slaughtering the mother of wide-eyed little Cindy You-Know-Who (Krystle Martin). But 20 years after their first fateful encounter, the now-grown-up tot is hellbent on revenge as the film takes audiences on a slay-ride in theaters starting Dec. 9.
However, it isn’t the only flick that’s turning innocent, beloved childhood characters into murderous monsters. A new, shocking horror film trend is setting its sights on the most virtuous creations — and even the filmmakers themselves may be wondering what cracked their craniums.
“I don’t know if there’s something broken in my brain as a child or whatever, but, like, kids’ cartoons — especially the really old ones in children’s books — those drawings really freaked me out,” confessed “The Mean One” director Steven LaMorte in a recent interview with horror site Dread Central.
“If we really thought about a green, furry, Bigfoot, Sasquatch — whatever you want to call it — that lives on a mountain and hates Christmas, is he gonna be giving hugs and high-fives? No,” LaMorte continued. “This thing is gonna be eating faces and, you know, slicing people up and causing mayhem.”
Wherever the inspiration originated, here are some of the other former innocents that are getting violent revisions in the not-too-distant future.
‘Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey’
(In theaters: Feb. 15, 2023)
The furry — and now feral — Pooh bear is turning Hundred Acre Wood into Hundred Scare Wood after children’s illustrator E.H. Shepard and author A.A. Milne’s plush pal hit the public domain earlier this year.
Apparently the tubby little cubby is still all stuffed with fluff — plus a generous amount of furor — as Pooh (played by Craig David Dowsett) and sidekick Piglet (Chris Cordell) seek revenge for being abandoned by Christopher Robin (Nikolai Leon). “They’ve gone back to their animal roots. They’re no longer tame: They’re like a vicious bear and pig who want to go around and try and find prey,” director Rhys Frake-Waterfield told Variety last spring about their horrific new hunting ground.
So much for the willy, nilly, silly old bear.
‘Bambi: The Reckoning’
(Filming starts in January 2023)
Bambi’s bunny buddy Thumper followed one rule: “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say nothing at all.” Doesn’t sound like that will apply here.
ITN Studios and Jagged Edge Productions, the studios behind “The Mean One,” will be back with another tale of apparent revenge, this one starring a certain orphaned deer. “Bambi will be a vicious killing machine that lurks in the wilderness. Prepare for Bambi on rabies!” said excited filmmaker Scott Jeffrey in announcing the project just last month. The “incredibly dark retelling” of the already surprisingly dark 1922 story and brighter 1942 Disney animated flick will be produced by none other than “Pooh” retooler Frake-Waterfield. (Sense a pattern here?)
Don’t expect much frollicking on ice — more like putting people on ice.
‘Peter Pan’s Neverland Nightmare’
(Just announced)
Tinker Bell may be stuck in Tinker Hell.
Frake-Waterfield, the “Blood and Honey” filmmaker apparently obsessed with crushing our childhoods, tipped off the Hollywood Reporter that he is also dreaming up a nightmarish scenario for Peter Pan, a k a “The Boy Who Wouldn’t Grow Up.” Whether that means a bloodier confrontation with Captain Hook — they may have to change the cap’s ship’s name to the Less-Than-Jolly Roger — or something far worse, we don’t know yet.
But Frake-Waterfield’s description of his upcoming Pooh-and-Piglet project could serve as a good indicator: “All of their hatred that they’ve built up over the years unleashes and they go on this rampage,” he told the Development Hell podcast last year.
Peter Pan fans probably should plan for more than just a mid-flight clipping of Tinker Bell’s wings.
