Cheers for pour decisions
Summer coming. Parties. It’s lazing, lolling, sipping. It’s tequila, Tanqueray, Tom Collins. How do celebrities knock off?
Katy Perry: “Having a couple will take me out of the game for a day or two. My self-control is weekdays.”
John Legend: “Me overdoing it sometimes has negative effects on my body, including my sleep.”
Gwyneth Paltrow: “During COVID I ate whatever and drank alcohol seven nights a week. It was interesting. Also wild.”
Bella Hadid: “I’m a ‘glass of Champagne and head home’ kind of girl.”
G. Clooney: “My aunt Rosemary Clooney’s advice was ‘Never mix grain and grape. Wine and tequila. Or vodka with Champagne.’ I was 7 when she told me. We learned early in Kentucky.” Whether he also smokes bluegrass, this he didn’t mention.
NYC ready to like Ike
With our White House election upon us, President “Ike” is returning. June 20, Theatre at St. Clement’s, “Eisenhower: This Piece of Ground” opens a seven-week off-Broadway run. John Rubinstein — our original “Pippin” 50 years ago — plays President Dwight David.
It’s 1962, fictional eavesdropping at his Gettysburg farm.
Remembering his Kansas upbringing, Army career, World War II victories. If it mentions that longtime non-military advance on his good-looking lady driver, this I don’t know.
For wed it’s worth
It’s almost JUNE. Weddings coming. Says wedding planner Michelle Rago:
“It’s destination ceremonies now. Rent planes, hit the Caribbean, forget 60 people — now it’s 350 invitees. I was brought in for Brooklyn Beckham’s just four weeks before.
“And mothers-in-law don’t always win a trophy. Today it’s like a scavenger hunt. Extravagant requests. One couple wanted helicopters to fly guests to some island. Another burned all the orchids.
“Things go wrong. Like no alcohol arrived. I had to charter a plane to bring Champagne then go through hell to clear customs and get it in. One lighting company was to hang 30,000 candles from the ceiling. Well, they didn’t arrive. The groom’s father went nuts. Another ceremony was outdoors and having just had surgery this one couldn’t be in the sun.”
You married? “No, divorced. I remember at my own wedding I drove everyone insane.”
Doctored script
Joke writer Laurie H about Queens comic Freddy G:
“I asked my wife to role-play a surgeon. She said: ‘Can’t. That’s a #MeToo power imbalance.’ So I also had to be a nurse.”
Some snappy ideas
Substack writer James Fragale: “There’s been thousands of storefront arrests. Robberies. Why not post Polaroids right on the store’s walls of these shoplifters. Splashing pictures of those caught red-handed might give the next generation of thieves some pause.”
Joe Biden. He knew Heinz when they only had three varieties. His milk carton mentions “Missing Children” — with a photo of the Lindbergh baby.
Only in America, kids, only in America.