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Sex & Relationships

‘Masterdating’ is the hottest new trend — all about the solo self-pleasuring craze

Singles in the city are self-pleasuring out in public. 

On any given night, you’re likely to spot a giddy guy or gal at a trendy restaurant, bar, museum or even a fully packed park, single-handedly going at it alone

“It” meaning a solo date, of course. 

Get your mind out of the gutter. 

“Masterdating,” the latest love and relationship trend to take social media by storm, is the practice of lavishing oneself with choice gifts, treats and outings in an effort to establish a healthy sense of self-sufficiency before entering a serious relationship with someone else. 

“Taking yourself out on dates is an exercise in self-love and self-compassion,” Amy Nobile, a holistic dating coach in the West Village, told The Post. 

“You’re teaching yourself about your own needs, requirements, the things that bring you joy,” she added. “It’s about uncovering your own passions.  

Singles in New York City and beyond are taking themselves on special dates as part of the TikTok-viral #MasterDating trend. NYPost Composite

As a relationship expert in the city, whose assistance with landing a soul mate in the city comes with a price tag of over $10,000, Nobile says flying solo can be just as exciting as being taken out by a handsome charmer or a smiley siren. 

“Make a whole day of it,” urged the expert, who suggests “masterdating” at least once a week. “Send yourself flowers in the morning, send yourself a sweet note saying, ‘I can’t wait to see you tonight,’ schedule a fancy mode of transportation to get yourself to the date — make it a full day of love.”

Online, the cheeky buzzword, which rings an eerie likeness to the word “masturbating,” has millennials and Gen Zs in a chokehold. 

Online, “masterdaters” proudly brag about the kind and loving ways they treat themselves. Getty Images/iStockphoto

In fact, beneath the trending hashtag #MasterDating, with more than 1.6 million TikTok views, hopeless romantics are living happily ever after by wining and dining themselves. And social media fans of “masterdating” have seemingly elected Miley Cyrus’ hit “Flowers” — a 2023 self-love anthem the pop singer sassily dropped on ex Liam Hemsworth’s birthday last January — its unofficial chant, using the viral ditty as featured audio in posts dedicated to the trend. 

Serial self-suitor Valerie Chapman — an NYU grad based in Manhattan who’s admittedly taken herself on more than 100 solo dates since age 15 — touted the trend as “the highest form of mediation” in a TikTok testimonial. 

“Go somewhere … by yourself, say ‘Table for one,’” the 23-year-old tastemaker instructed her more than 42,000 fans. 

“You’re gonna walk in with your shoulders rolled back, order whatever you want, eat whatever dish you want, drink whatever you want … go crazy,” she continued before revealing the lone-rendezvous cardinal rule. 

Holistic dating coach Amy Nobile says practicing self-love on a regular basis can aid in finding true love with a romantic partner. Getty Images

“No phones. Would you want your date to be on the phone [while they’re out] with you?” questioned Chapman. “No. So don’t do it to yourself.”

And singletons aren’t the only ones enjoying a partnerless tryst. 

Kyle, a married medium from Australia who’s been hitched to his husband for nearly two decades, says he “masterdates” all the time. 

“For me … it’s being your own cheerleader, best friend, supporter. It is true self-love,” said Kyle in a post. “You’re not gonna pine and wait [for] a person to do this or that … F–k waiting. Give it to yourself.”

@thecrystallinemage

Masterdating is an integral part of self-love. Especially when single but for all of us, we need to see our own value, our own needs and then without guilt give to you! I’ve literally done this my whole adult life and it’s come up a bunch of times recently so I had to talk about it! Do you Masterdate? What’s your favourite thing to do? #thecrystallinemage #magelife #selflove #spirituality101 #philosophy #earlymorningphilosophy #masterdating #masterdate #masterdater

♬ original sound – Kyle the Crystalline Mage

And Nobile agrees. 

“Don’t worry about feeling self-conscious or lonely about taking yourself out on dates,” she urged to The Post. “You’re a good time. You deserve to be treated well. Go enjoy being with yourself.”

And she says a shameless “masterdate” could result in a hot date with Mr. or Mrs. Right. 

“While you’re out enjoying yourself, your vibration rises — and the highest vibration is love,” said Nobile. “When you’re loving yourself, you become a magnet that attracts love from others.”