Mom accused of spoiling her young son by asking for an invite to girls-only event
A woman who is upset that her young son was not invited to a bridal shower should use this as a teaching moment rather than repeatedly complain to the host of the party, a psychotherapist told Fox News Digital on Tuesday, Feb. 27, about the situation.
The woman, a Reddit user named “AppropriateFan9268,” asked the subreddit “Am I the A–hole” if she was wrong “for trying to get my son into an event that he’s not invited to.”
In the post, written earlier this week, AppropriateFan9268 said her husband’s cousin is having a bridal shower ahead of her upcoming wedding.
“I was the only one in my household invited, so I assumed there were no kids invited, which is pretty standard,” AppropriateFan9268 wrote.
This, however, was not the case: She found out that young female relatives were invited — but not the other boy cousins.
“Fine, I’ve heard of that before,” she said. “However, my two sons (9 and 7) heard that their girl cousins were invited and my 7-year-old felt very left out.”
Her older son, said AppropriateFan9268, did not care that he wasn’t invited.
“I reached out to my husband’s Aunt Liz, who is hosting the shower, to see if an exception could be made,” she said.
And while her husband’s aunt was “nice about it,” she said the boys were not invited as the venue had size limitations and that the theme of the party was “very feminine.”
The aunt “was apologetic, and I ended the conversation because it was awkward,” wrote AppropriateFan9268.
Her son, however, is still upset, apparently – and AppropriateFan9268 wanted to know if she should reach out to her husband’s aunt again to ask for an exception.
“My husband thinks I need to let it go. AITA?” asked others on the thread.
A psychotherapist and author told Fox News Digital that the woman should indeed let it go and teach her son some valuable lessons.
“This is a great opportunity for the mother to help her son cope with his uncomfortable feelings,” Amy Morin, LCSW, the Florida-based author of the book “13 Things Mentally Strong Parents Don’t Do” told Fox News Digital in an email.
“Whether he’s feeling sad, rejected or frustrated, she can show him hands-on strategies for managing those feelings that are going to be part of life,” she said.
AppropriateFan9268 can always skip the party if she is offended on behalf of her son, noted Morin.
“But repeatedly asking for an invitation isn’t a good idea,” she said, adding that this behavior “teaches her children that badgering, nagging or guilting others is OK.”
Reddit users largely agreed.
In the 2,000 or so replies to the post, nearly all said that the mother who shared her story was in the wrong.
On the AITA subreddit, people can reply to posts and indicate the poster is “NTA” (“Not the A–hole”), “YTA” (“You’re the A–hole”), “NAH” (“No A–holes Here”) or “ESH” (“Everyone Sucks Here”).
Users can “upvote” responses they think are helpful and “downvote” ones that are not.
“YTA. Stop insisting. The first time was a polite conversation, but the second request is likely to be frowned upon, especially since the bride won’t change her mind,” said Reddit user “Asciutta” in the top-upvoted comment.
This user continued, “This is a learning moment for your child. Explain to him that he won’t always get what he wants in life, and that he won’t be invited to every event. And there will be plenty of events to which he won’t be invited.”
Another top comment was considerably more blunt.
“You are so far out of line you have left the county. This is a teachable moment for your son that he doesn’t get to go everywhere he wants and he won’t be invited to everything,” said user “Ornery-Octopus.”
This same user added, “This is a girls-only event — he doesn’t belong there.”
And yet another said that the woman’s actions were turning her son “into an entitled, spoiled brat.”
“Huge YTA,” said a Reddit user named “Critical_Armadillo32.”
