Playing political games
Soho Playhouse. Coming soon. “The Ghost of John McCain.” Yesterday, I reported Meghan McCain calls this new play “trash — a gross cash grab by mediocre desperate people.”
I’ve now seen the script, it’s 93 pages. Lines like: “Lindsey Graham can snort Adderall off a stomach.”
Someone says to the late John McCain: “You’re born 1936. You’re not even cold yet.” One scene is Teddy Roosevelt on a toilet.
Call girls get called “coked-out hookers.” A Roy Cohn type says: “F—k. F—k. F—k. F—k. F—k.” A Hillary Clinton character wears devil horns. An intercom announces: “Kiss my ass.” A Sarah Palin’s told “shut up.” A character announces: “I’m not a fan of bulls —t.” A Lady Gaga type shows to say, “I love big men because they fill me up.”
I’m just reporting this in case you’re tired of creativity by Shakespeare, Chekhov, Tennessee Williams, Oscar Wilde and Neil Simon.
Such a smooth talking head
Bulletin: Whispers whisper a certain pol who loves burbling on TV maybe had Botox. I know nothing.
But if out filling their cheeks, how can DC VIPs work on Ukraine, Russia, Taiwan, China, Iran, Iraq, both Koreas, climate control, drones control, cranky airlines, crime, inflation, gun control, health care, drugs, terrorism, migrants, Soros, poverty, homelessness, removing Bernie Sanders and Kamala if busily getting their faces puffed?
Another taxidermist visit and one particular senator’s eye might close.
Well-constructed sentences
Yesterday, I told you that contractor Aidan McCormack, while detonating an East 80s wall, discovered stuck inside it was my column. Was I stopping up some leak or covering a mouse hole?!
He’s sent me the crinkled paper, Friday, Nov. 2, 1990, New York Post, and the news then? Here’s what I could make out:
“Shirley MacLaine then told me: ‘My brother Warren Beatty’s a misunderstood male. He only wants a woman he can turn to for love, companionship and sympathy — preferably in three different hotels.’”
Sign language
Psychology experts on our twitches — knuckle cracking, paper-clip fiddling, beard stroking, etc.
Nose twitching: Running a finger around, across or up it means, “Nervous manifestation. Hiding something, avoiding truth.”
Constantly opening, closing, recapping your pen: adult thumb-sucking. Gum flavor changes, cigarettes burn up, the cap never changes. Opening and closing expresses anxiety.
Nail biter: adult bed-wetting. Psychologically feeding things one feels he shouldn’t have. Habit form of remaining young.
Ring fiddling: checking, twisting it, moving it up and down. Some sip water, others blow smoke. The fiddle is when listening — not talking. Immobile, bored, it’s creative beings getting exercise.
Opening/closing paper clips: form of escapism. Variation is turning bits of paper into little balls. Something to do while wishing you were elsewhere doing something else.
Traveler’s tip: This smart guy and his wife took a summer cruise to Europe. Always cautious, careful about theft, he tucked $500 in his sock. So what happened to him? A dwarf picked his ankle.
Only leaving New York, kids, only leaving New York.